Once upon a time, vulnerability was shameful to me. It was a flaw. I thought I needed to be strong and in control; that vulnerability was an unwanted state, something that should’ve passed over a long time ago. Insecurity was shameful and since I wanted to be worthy of love and connection, I couldn’t afford being flawed like that.
Then I did this work with self compassion and learned to embrace the shame; to meet it and love myself whatever I felt. To be there for me wholeheartedly.
Now courageous vulnerability has become my safe haven, my gateway to liberation, inner peace, freedom, connection, contact, joy, self worth, creativity, genuineness and space. It gives me integrity and strength.
I’ve made a very conscious decision to allow myself to be a work in progress, to be proud of myself for doing the work, wherever I am on my journey, whatever my difficulties are. I’ve decided that I’m allowed to be brilliant and confused, secure and insecure, very wise and in the fog, free in the moment and affected by old wounds, with a lot to say or just quiet. Everything is ok.
And I know this vulnerability is my way from insecurity to security, from fog to clarity, from tension to relaxation. Everything is ok, every day, again and again.
It’s ok to forget the new and fall into the past. I can just vulnerably admit that and rise again, into the new. Into the present moment.
Love,
Evalotta.